Duh...Keep It To Yourself!

I read these excerpts from a local publication and feel compelled to quote them here because of the irresistible humor and wit embodied in each thought. Cojones --means balls in Spanish which can also be referred to as guts. Yet, what is the difference between balls and guts ? "Guts is when you arrive home late, after a night out with the boys. Your wife opens the door wielding a broom. If you have guts, you ask: Are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?" And balls? Again, you come home late after a night out with the boys. You reek of perfume and beer. And there are lipstick smears on your collar. If you have balls, you whack your wife on her bottom and snort: 'You're next'. There is no difference in the outcome. "Both will ultimately result in death." And speaking of death, get this: "When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep; not screaming--like all the other passengers in his car." An obstetri...

Let me start by saying that I'm nowhere near obese. I don't consider myself fat. However, I felt like it would be nice to lose a few pounds just for the trouble of it. My target--lose at least five(5) pounds in a month's time. With the schedule that I have, it's impossible to go to the gym, and do some exercise. So I decided to look for some weight loss pills that I can take that will aid me in my pursuit of shedding off a few pounds--be a guinea pig for a while. There's a lot of weight loss pills out there, but I don't necessarily trust them. But the one that I decided on trying was a weight loss product shared to me by a trusted friend. I actually started taking it about a month ago. I will not specify the name of the product but I'll give away a few hints just for the curious reader. The product is manufactured in Japan. That alone is a plus because most Japanese products have high quality standards. These are the ingredients supposedly contained in each ...

This is an important day of the year for me. I tend to become so emotionally vulnerable on this day. I don't know why, but maybe it's because I share the pain that my mother felt when she brought me to this world. It ain't a joke for a woman to go through the pains of labor and the roller coaster ride of emotions she has to endure afterwards. Well, without getting too confusing, let me just say that birthdays are but a reminder to each and everyone of us that indeed life is so precious to be taken for granted. It's a day for us to acknowledge the many blessings that we have despite whatever kind of hardships we may be going through. A birthday is a celebration of many good things: another shot at life to become wiser, become richer in spirit; another chance to be able to connect and reach out to other human beings; another chance to find out and live our purpose in this life; another chance to becoming a better person than we were a year ago, but above all, another chan...

I am not quite the average person. In many ways I am unique. I have a broader sense of understanding than most people do. My field of interests covers a wider scope. I am independent and I chose to do things on my own if I am able to do them rather than ask somebody to do it in my behalf. In other words, I have a good sense of well-being. But as I get older, I notice strange habits that really bother me to some extent. It's my dilemma and I am still trying to dig deeper into it to find out why I do the things that I do. You decide, is it an obsession? Is it a compulsion? Or both? When I do my grocery shopping, stuff has to be grouped accordingly: ( exempli gratia ) all dry goods, canned goods, boxed goods, all frozen stuff, all veggies and fruits, all cleaning and laundry stuff--and not a single item should be mixed up with the rest. At times when the bagging attendant helps, and doesn't put away the stuff the same way I grouped, it really bothers me so much, almost to the poi...

A few weeks back I met a friend, and was just amazed that after not seeing each other for quite some time---ten years at least, he still recognized me and was the first one to call my attention. I was a bit embarrassed because, at the back of my head somehow, I could not recall his name. But he politely, reintroduced himself. More so, he still recalled how I was referred to in the old days. Anyway, it was just a short exchange of kind words, as well as phone numbers. One thing that struck me though was that he made mention about a possible business venture that we both could pursue in the near future. He was genuinely interested in it and he even emphasized to me several points like: the business aspect of it is kinda new; he's still trying to verify the authenticity of the business; he'll let me know as soon as he makes up his mind about the biz. I gladly thank him for the meeting and kept his number for future reference. When I got home and recalled the meeting I was just p...

Age is a great equalizer because rich or poor, male and female alike, go through the process of aging. Some go through it faster than they should, and some lucky few, a little slower than most people. But how do we measure aging? Is it the lines on our forehead? Is it the tightness of our skin? Is it the color of our hair? Is it the dentures that we wear? Is it the insecurities that we bear? Truly, devastating as it is, all of the above depict how well we age with time. They say that the more lines you have on your forehead, the older you look. And if your skin starts to sag somewhere, that's aging. On the other hand, our hair turns gray as we get older. Also, as we grow older some of us lose most of our teeth, which is a normal part of the body's wear and tear. Strikingly, though, as we get old, the more insecure we become. In our present generation, most older people are not treated as an influential part of society anymore. In fact, most younger people have no regard for t...

There's nothing sweeter than the memory of a wonderful childhood. It's like a gift that you'll keep on wrapping and unwrapping time and time again. I grew up in an island in the southern part of the Philippines, a nice little municipality named Dapitan . The place is paradise to me for it's where I was born and raised. I can confidently say, that it used to be my playground, and it still is, and will remain to be. Being a little kid in the 80s was sweet, for way back then life was much simpler. The air we breathe was fresher and cleaner and purer, and there was just so much beauty in the innocence of life without the hard-wired gadgets that the present generation offers. I remembered then that I never had a single toy. My parents never bought a toy for me or my siblings. But in the neighborhood, no one did, and no one had. It was a privilege that we all shared in the neighborhood and I call it as such because having nothing inspired us to be creative and resourceful ev...

My friend and I decided to go on an adventure in New York so once and for all we get the feel of the spirit of the holiday season in the big apple. We thought it would be more fun to go at night, to enjoy the city lights and the Christmas decorations and all that can only happen in NY. And true enough, we trekked the streets of 42 nd all the way to the 50 th . The streets were never empty. People of different races and backgrounds were everywhere, that it's basically impossible to tell who the real New Yorkers were and who were merely there for the fun and adventure. It was a night to remember. With the chilly night air at 48 degrees Fahrenheit you could wish that you were somewhere in your room all cuddled up under a warm blanket. But no, you won't even feel the cold. There's too much sights and sounds to numb your senses. It's pure leisure and pleasure just walking through the streets of New York. And did I say Rockefeller? The place was just packed with people, and...

I was on holiday vacation in New York when my sister sent me an e-mail that one of my colleagues called up to let me know that our friend just went into a coma. I was shocked to hear the news, at the same time, scenes were already playing in my head as to what can possibly happen next. All sort of unpleasant thoughts came hovering in my mind. Then I called up my colleague to check on our friend. The news came hard--SHE DIED!--a day after being in a comatose state. It turned out she had a brain tumor that none of us knew of. Then I looked back. In February 2005, we went out together with the other friends we had. We had fun, dining, gossiping and even doing a bowling match. She was just a spectator then cause she was already partially blind. All we knew at that time was that, she had acute glaucoma that's slowly blinding her, and in turn crippling her as well. She was a helpless soul, being single and loveless, and at that time. I would look at her and think that life could not get ...